Thursday, January 3, 2013

Who I want to be...

This post was inspired by me being the not so fit in that I have always been and continue to be.

People tend to describe themselves with the best adjectives. Giving strangers a picture or description of who they think they are. No one ever really tells you who they want to be, or how they want to be or even how they plan to get there. People can tell you all of their good qualities yet struggle to find their bad qualities and some people can't handle the combination.

Me I'm simple, because I'm a realist, but I feel like society doesn't have a place for me. I'm honest with myself no matter how gruesome it gets because I owe that to me. I live inside me 24/7 and I refuse to live a lie. I can tell you that I am unhappy with who I am, but I don't know how to be anyone else. I'm a little bit smart. A lot of bit dumb. Sometimes clueless. I'm forgetful. I get confused easy. I make things much more than they need to be (My chemistry professor once told me "I don't think you understand unless it's complex." I'm too compassionate. My feelings get hurt easy. You can hurt my feelings quicker than you can make me mad. I'm annoying. I'm picky I love to joke around. I don't like people to joke around with me. I'm a BIG BABY. I like to be taken care of. I'm Lazy. I can be selffish.

But, I'm also a hard worker. I love to help people. I'm persistent. I'm kind. I'm caring. I'm a go getter. I'm optimistic. I'm hopeful. I love to see people succeed. I love to help people reach their goals and motivate them. I'm a leader because, I'm good at being a follower. I'm inquisitive. I'm unique.

I look on facebook and instagram all around. I see so many young people who term themselves as being "BAD" and all that is fine it that is there cup of tea but I want to be more than a negative connotated term. I want to be the BEST at everything that I do. I want to be remembered as the person who gave her life to help the achievement of others.

What do we teach our children?... What do offer ourselves?

Do we force ourselves to fit into societal templates, and then deny such actions. That being nerdy is only cool or in style when it's intentional and that being yourself is only acceptable when it is in style. OH GOSH.. I struggle so hard with this being a woman it is difficult and being a woman with a daughter. Because, how can someone who doesn't know who they are raise someone to be great or even more than that the best person that they can be.

If ever you have read my bio you know that aside from my dream of wanting to become rich I blog for my daughter. So that she can determine who her mother was and see who she tried to  become. I don't want her to look to anything or anyone to define herself because I have spent too much time doing that myself. But I know that I cannot control the paths she choose to walk I can only serve as the prints in the dirt. I do however challenge her and everyone for that matter to look inside themselves and pull out the best them in 2013 and every year there after.

People tend to want to remake and remodel and all of that is good. But sometimes you can make the best meals from an scarce kitchen. It may not be thanksgiving dinner. It may not even be Sunday. But if it fills your stomach it has served it's purpose. Let's challenge everyone we know to find and serve their purpose to not consume themselves with the garbage that the world offers us but to become the sustenance that it needs.

1 comment:

  1. This was a GREAT post! Very honest and real! I may do a similar post and link back to you.